Too many people live timidly, avoiding promises and trying to avoid the shame of being caught in transgression of their own professed standards. It is best, they believe, to proclaim no standard and project no values in order to keep their options open. So in an effort to fully indulge fetish and avoid episodes of momentary shame they instead become impervious to shame, oblivious to the fact that they lead entirely shameful lives.
A denial of morality and commitment is not the clever trick many believe it to be for obviating shame or building unassailable character. Indeed such denial reveals the utter absence of character for all to see. Without the bond of commitment nothing can be built and growth becomes impossible. By avoiding commitment you ensure that no one remains committed to you. A life of avoidance is a shrinking life.
Live a life of commitment. Project your values and proclaim your highest standards, then do your best to consistently meet them every day. Face down your fear and make your word your promise, then keep your promises. When you fail—and you will—acknowledge the shame you’ve earned and earnestly commit yourself to doing better and being better. That is how you grow, and only in this way may you grow.